Tuesday, May 31, 2005

Theee song! (Please forgive me by Brian Adams)

I would love to fall in love with someone and ten/twenty years later sing this song to them and mean it. This lyrics are just the mother of all lyrics and though I have been soo unlucky in love, I still hope that one day I will meet that man that will make me feel like an angel on every anniversary. Imagine looking into someones eyes and telling them 'still feels like the first time .......' woi woi aki guys that would make me 'neak' in the knees and am not talking ol' age! The emotions this song brings out in me cant be translated, they can only be felt.

It still feels like our first night together
Feels like the first kiss
It's getting better baby
No one can better this
Still holding on
You're still the one
First time our eyes met
Same feeling I get
Only feels much stronger
I wanna love you longer
you still turn the fire on

So if you're feeling lonely, don't
You're the only one I'll ever want
I only want to make it go
So if I love you a little more than I should ...

Please forgive me, I know not what I do
Please forgive me, I can't stop loving you
Don't deny me, this pain I'm going through
Please forgive me, if I need you like I do
Please believe me (Oh believe it), every word I say is true
Please forgive me, I can't stop loving you

Still feels like our best times are together
Feels like the first touch
Still getting closer baby
Can't get closer enough
Still holding on
You're still number one
I remember the smell of your skin
I remember everything
I remember all the moves
I remember you yeah
I remember the nights, you know I still do

So if you're feeling lonely, don't
You're the only one I'll ever want
I only want to make it go
So if I love you a little more than I should ...
Please forgive me, I know not what I do
Please forgive me, I can't stop loving you
Don't deny me, this pain I'm going through
Please forgive me, if I need you like I do
Please believe me (Oh believe it), every word I say is true
Please forgive me, I can't stop loving you

Guitar solo

The one thing I'm sure of
Is the way we make love
The one thing I depend on
Is for us to stay strong
With every word and every breath I'm praying
That's why I'm saying

Please forgive me, I know not what I do
Please forgive me, I can't stop loving you
Don't deny me, this pain I'm going through
Please forgive me, if I need you like I do
Babe believe it, every word I say is true
Please forgive me, if I can't stop loving you
No, believe, I don't know what I do
Please forgive me, I can't stop loving you

I can't stop ... loving you ... (from seeklyrics)


Feel free to share your greatest love song of all time and pray for this girl, sawa?

Sunday, May 29, 2005

Tagged...Movies....

Nick you tagged the wrong person. I hardly watch movies so dont expect anything interesting aiight. Here we go ....

1. Total number of films I own on dvd/video:
I have like twenty DVDs only one pirate copy ..metrix 2

2. The last film I bought:
I bought those buy three for £20 so the answer is What women want, Pelican brief & outbreak

3.The last film I watched:
on screen I cant remember I just dont fancy going to the cinema on ma own anymore. I know its sometime mid 2004 but honestly I just cant remember.
Tv: I saw father of the bride on ITV yesterday
On DVD The Punisher and am going to watch Collateral today.

4.Five films that I watch a lot or that mean a lot to me:
I watch Two can play this game quite a lot.
Mrs Doubtfire
Speed one this one I never get over and dont think will ever do.
Outbreak not so much but I love it.
Save the last dance..I find this so romantic


5. Tag five people and have them put this in their journal:
I think every active KBW member has been tagged but let me shop around some more. I will probably end up tagging people outside the ring. And if you havent been tagged please be a sweetie and put this in your journal.

Its not fair that some people have tagged others yet they havent completed the tagg themselves. This is me whinning....just ignore

Yippie found some pple to tag Migz , Shobali , Kenyan Pundit , Wanjiru's nest & Udi

My brathas and sister am so sorry but y'all been tagged.

Thursday, May 26, 2005

Tribute to The Mighty reds

I know am a Chelsea girl but this is a piece of hist'ry, that and the fact that I can now post photos. To all the liverpool fans Big Up!



half time


going to extra time, what's the plan boss?


Dudek you are the man dude


who'd have thought! Steve Gerald lives his dream.


Heavy but can be lifted

Did anyone read Mental's post "destiny"? This is my version, next year chelsea will win four cups and that includes the European cup! THE BLUES DESTINY


BTW All the picture are from the bbc website.

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

Pimp my ride!


NOVOTOYOTA
Originally uploaded by Farmgal.
Dear people

I finally got a car. Alloy rims, massive stereo system, flashy colors,
very
low on fuel etc - it absolutely unbelievable. I got it from Toyota and
they
told me I will be one of the first people using it in the UK.

I however suspect that it will not pass a thorough scrutiny when I try
to
get an MOT.

Tell me if you are of the same view


Got this from a a friend, thanks friend!

Monday, May 23, 2005

'Your Life Is a Theater'

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Invite Your Audience Carefully

Not everyone is healthy enough to have a front row seat in our lives.
There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a DISTANCE.

It's amazing what you can accomplish when you let go of, or at least minimize your time with, draining, negative, incompatible, not-going-anywhere relationships/friendships.

Observe the relationships around you. Pay attention.

Which ones lift and which ones lean?
Which ones encourage and which ones discourage?
Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which ones are going downhill?
When you leave certain people do you feel better or feel worse?
Which ones always have drama or don't really understand, know or appreciate you?

The more we seek quality, respect, growth, peace of mind, love and truth around us...the easier it will become for us to decide who gets to sit in the front row and who should be moved to the balcony of Our Life.

"If you cannot change the people around you, CHANGE the people you are around."

Remember that the people we hang with will have an impact on both our lives and our income. And so we must be careful to choose the people we hang out with, as well as the information with which we feed our minds.

We should not share our dreams with negative people, Nor feed our dreams with negative thoughts. It's our choice and our life... choose wisely.

It's up to us who and what we let in it...

writer unknown


I saw the above and thought about my current relationships. Are they all worth having?

Saturday, May 21, 2005

The game I'd love to hate

I watched the eff eh cup final today, I know you're thinking "so did I" and the rest of the world. My answer to that is 'I know' I can't believe just how much I have come to love football, I jump up when I think the team 'am supporting is going to score, I scream at the ref incase he can't see the foul I have just seen.....and yah with my hands on my head! I jump and scream just like everyone else when the team am rooting for gets the back of the net, I kick, clench my fist, hug strangers at the pub, the other Farmgal comes out to play. yeah baby! Now am learning the lyrics of the songs sang by the Chelsea funs! Eeeish I think this is going a little bit further than I had planned...Oh I had not planned anything.

I had made a vow to myself that I'd never get emotional when a team thats not Chelsea was chasing that piece of leather, how wrong! Today I sat there convinced myself that it was a cup final so I'd just watch for the sake of it. Before I knew it I was supporting Arsenal after supporting Man U for like ten minutes...dont ask why I chose to go with Arsenal.

All the feelings I feel when Chelsea is playing descended on me. Before I knew it I was jumping, screaming at the ref and the Man U players etc etc
My friend who dares not call me when Chelsea is playing called. my greeting went like.."hello ..come on arsenal...oh hey babes do you know there is....oh migod goal, goal, goal, nooooo ...Oh I was sayin there's football si you call me later...aaaaaaahhhhhh men! Ok babes b'dae(laters) and back to football. Why was I getting so worked up I mean its just football.

The bad thing about this FA cup final is that it went to penalties or what I call the battle of the goalies. I hate when that happens, so the last few minutes of extra time I was screaming ..'somebody score please anyone please, no penalties please score' (ouch my lungs hurt) Adrenaline kicked in when we went to extra time. There is no explaning how I was feeling at this point and trust me its worse where Chelsea is involved. I will not even tell you what happens during the world cup...I will tell you during the next world cup. By the way did I tell you that when England was kicked out of the last world cup, I honestly swear I promised myself that football had ceased to be a part of me. Yaani that day I went to the pub at 7am to watch that game 7am dear brethren....what time did I leave my warm bed? Of course I forgot the pain I experienced that day very quickly.

Now I love the others too ... rugby, tennis, snooker, cricket(kaimagini) and golf. I even watch the sports channels and always check the latest sports news on sky sport and trust me there is no man in my house controlling the remote..uuuuui kairetu...I know!

BTW This is for all the Liverpool fans out there, I have not gotten over you taking our place in the championship final. kwani that ref at the semis was blind! That was not a goal and I have seen it replayed from all angles. aaargghh

I really want this love affair with football to end so today I promise myself (mind am not sure if I can keep this promise) that I will never try and get home early to catch you, I will not be going to the pub with you for a drink, I will not be checking up on you on sky sports, I will not tell my friends about you anymore and I dont care if you are in season or out ...am not finished, I will not be wearing that expensive hat with your name on it....am not kidding this time we are over.

Yourspainfully
Farmgal

Friday, May 20, 2005

And while we are @ quotes

Saw this on an extreem makeover advert


Time may be a great healer ..............

But a lousy beautician!

How so true.

If you can you tell just how bored I am, please entertain me.

Love is strange

Love is a friendship caught on fire. -- Northern Exposure

I read the above here Truly Love is strange! This has to be the most interesting defination of love I have ever come across.
I met two couples recently who got together after years of being friends. They look so happy and I can say their friendship did catch some wild fire.

Wanjiru's Nest I hope you don't mind me borrowing this from your blog.

Thursday, May 19, 2005

HTML

Last night I stayed up late learning some Html stuff online. Now thanks to Mental I can do new stuff on my blog.

I thought I was going to have a bit of sleep this morning......yeah right I was woken up by the painter doing the windows. Scrapping, brushing and all other noises associated with painting were my wake up call alright.

Mental I swear my dreams last night were in HTML.

Thanks for all your help, now I know why Mama J dedicated a whole blog to you sometime back.

Shukran!

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Pimp me up

Dark skin......

I don't know why but I easily fall for a man with dark skin. I'd go out with someone with different skin tone but dark is sexier to me. If you know any light skin guy..... begger can't choose.

God fearing....

This I hope is self explanatory and is my number one on the list.

Sweet...

babyface sweet ain't bad at all.

Good kisser....

I don't like very very wet kisses unless we are making .... I can't write it, I'm that shy!

Respect....

Someone who totally respects women overall. I mean their mama, sisters etc.

Cuddly & abit touchy feely....

I love to cuddle. Imagine just sitting there with your lover saying nothing but clinging on to each other like there is bila tomorrow. Touching is good, it kinda says.."I can't get enough of you"

Phone manners...

If you hang up before you can finish saying goodbye, goodnite, ta etc then no thanks. I love longish goodbyes and unless your boss just walked in on you, then a sudden hang-up is not acceptable. I don't even like it when friends do that.

Communication......

At least we got to talk daily on email, phone, text etc There are so many options out there so there is no excuse. If you love someone you must make time for them PERIOD!!!!!!! Unless you are in Iraq.

Geography....

Be in Uk or be willing to move here (this is my home).

Generous.....

I promise to give my all if you do the same.

Temper.....

Keep it in check I can't shout therefore would not want to be shouted at.

Forgiving...

I think if you are in a relationship you learn to forgive daily. People hurt us everday and we hurt others daily. Like when you don't return phonecalls....you know the rest.

Honest....

I mean in all ways, if I hurt you you tell me, if you feel I have let you down you tell me. If you aren't feeling me anymore you tell me. Don't tell me in public though!

I will write some more soon, for now pimp me up!

Monday, May 16, 2005

Don't forget what's behind this blog!

Don't let my last few blogs mislead you.
I am still looking for love so my blog-mates help!
Are there any single bloggers in the ring?

Sunday, May 15, 2005

My other pervert of an uncle!

Two

One of my aunties from meru was getting married, all the family who could make the long trip packed inside a 'face me' and drove all the way to meru.

I think I must have been 14 years old or so, going to 15. Being an early bloomer my period started early and my boobs were like a C cup while all my friend still had those dots. I really hated having boobs then! I hid behind big jumpers and lesoz.

The wedding took place on a Saturday and a big reception was was held at the groom's home. On sunday their was a reception held in honour of the bride's family at the groom's. Yaani two receptions with mokimo, roast meat and the works!

Unfortunately the second day I didnt go because of my period. Every girl knows that the first one or two years during that time of the month are never comfortable. I chose to stay home and lounge. I didn't think I had company at home until my meru uncle (brother of the bride) came in half an hour after everyone else was gone.

I could not believe it when jamaa started hitting on me. Before that, I was really tight with this uncle and I was too young to think in those lines anyway. I promised him that I would scream if he dared lay a finger on me. I managed to get out of the situation in good time. Not knowing where I was going, I left and walked around for along time and got back home when everyone else was there.

I remember a girlfriend told me her story and to be honest girls have gone through hell..... her uncle would finger her and fondle her boobies. He made her promise not to tell anyone otherwise she would be killed. It went on for ages and one day she decided to tell her mum. Her mum slapped the daylights out of her and accused her of telling lies. She still remembers that slap, I advised her to remind her mum of the saga recently....her mum cried and begged her to forgive her for not believing she was being molested. It was a tear jerking moment but a bit too late I think.

I believe boys are molested too.... while they are growing up! By whom you may ask.....mbooch wengi sana!
So many mothers have no idea but maids do it to their boys...I have had a few stories!

The reason why girls dont tell when they are raped is that they fear that no one will believe them. Thank God for DNA but still its 'ngumu'

Girls have a heart we look at the bigger picture. We care so much about what telling would lead to. Family feuds and all that, girls I think sometimes its best we think about ourselves.

Am I over past hurts?

Today being sunday I went to church. The preacher today got me thinking about my past.... relationshipwise......boyfriends, friends, family, girlfriends.... and bad ones in this case.

Hurt...

Everyone one has been hurt by somebody at some point in their lives. What happened after you were last hurt? Did you swear never to give your heart to someone else? Did you promise never too speak to that someone again? Did you promise yourself to be very careful the next time you fell in love/made freinds? etc etc

My two peverts of uncles!

One

I remember when I was around 14years old.......
I hated hunging out with my girl cousins so I spent most of the time with my boy cousins and young uncles listening to music while they sipped on some illicit brew. ( this was at my nan's during holidays) During this times, my dad's parent's homestead would be packed to capacity therefore cooking meant cooking for like forty people everday, not to mention the teas that were made like ten times a day! My stunt was to hang out with the boys in their 'thingira' (boys rooms separate from main house). All this time all the other girls my age would be slaving in the kitchen doing dinners, teas and the most dreaded mountain of dishes.

At my dad's there were two telly's at two different houses, after dinner we'd choose our favourite aunty's house and catch mamboleo and news on that one channel KBC. My uncle and I chose one house while the rest headed to a different house. This uncle was drunk (remember that brew)!

We are walking side by side, kidogo kidogo I found myself pinned on the wall of my aunty's house, I didnt have time to get shocked. I needed to get out of there fast. I slid down the wall and under his arms and ran. I know I pushed him out of my way, I was very small and the fact that he was maji helped me.

I realise that that experience contributed to the way I have treated men I have gone out with in the past.

Thank God I dont feel hurt by the all the bad experiences.

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Hit on by a teacher

The saga on saturday got me thinking about the inappropriate and appropriate hits I have had in my life.

When I was a third former their was this teacher we had nicknamed Mr Hoots which was derived from his real name. This guy was a family friend and he would bring me stuff from home whenever he visited my mum. I was in boarding school see and I hated the food especially days of cabbage.

As a senior prefect I hung out with teachers alot, which was considered lucky especially when the cute ones were on duty. I remember one Mr M who was such a hunk all the girls were drooling and wishing he would just speak to them.

I was on holiday and Mr Hoots had come to visit, he stayed on for a while then said he had to go visit his cousin not so far from my area code. He asked my mum if she could allow me to go along. We didn't have a reason to think he had other plans up his sleeve or should I say trouser!

We arrive at the cousin's house, after introductions they start speaking in their mama's tongue. Kidogo the cousin leaves, I am thinking jamaa has gone to buy some milk... I was wrong!

The respectable teacher comes close to me and starts to touch me (alarm bells go off in my head and I mean loud ones) I push him back and gather some courage and ask him what the hell he thought he was doing. I have never told anyone about this not even my mum, though I can still remember how scared I was. What if he raped me?

That fool! Does he even know how scared I was?

On the way back home all he did was beg not to tell, he apologised over and over again. I did not promise him anything, I thought if I left him guessing then he would not try it on with any other girl.

I cant remember failing swahili exams after that saga!

I think I should have told!

Monday, May 09, 2005

The wedding

The weather....

It was perfect for the day, not cold and not too hot. My sleeveless dress and open shoes were perfect for the occasion.

The Nigerian (no offence)

Am older than 27...... how can a man who is actually older than my dad dart me? This guy (old man) helped me park my car and even looked all over the place for me when cops came issuing tickets on wrongly parked motis. A tow truck was even called, but my car was sawa. After I confirmed that my banger was ok, the old mzee turns to me and says he likes my smile and my teeth! I immediately became suspicious. Are you married or seeing anyone was the next query. Ala! mzee is hitting on me and I was missing the kiss the bride moment for zero. I tried to excuse myself in the most polite way avoiding to sound irritated. He insists that I give him my number so he can call me and pay me a visit.....I want to puke!

From the pulpit..

The speaker was just right for the occasion, didn't speak for more than 30minutes. He was funny too! His opening joke was.... A young boy was returning home from a wedding with his dad.......

Dad: Were you paying attention to what the minister was saying?
Boy: Yes
Dad: How many wives did he say a man should have?
Boy: Sixteen!
Dad: You were not listening young man. Can you tell me when he said that
Boy: When he said 4-better, 4-worse, 4-richer and 4-poorer!

The men...

One of them sent my friend to say that he liked me. Was I supposed to go to him and strike up a conversation? I spent most of my time trying so hard to avoid my eyes meeting the old Nigerian's so I didn't have a good look around.

The wedding party looked fabulous by the way and other than the Nigerian trying to get my attention throughout, I had some good fun and made really good friends both male and female.

Friday, May 06, 2005

Going to a wedding.........

Hey guys am going to a wedding kesho. I know thats one of the best places to hook up with someone or am I wrong?

Imagine all the well dressed people....eeerr men in suits, ties, their best colognes, neat hair cuts & neat bearded faces. It will be unfortunate if most of this men are taken, but there is always one or two single ones (got to have some hope). Did I forget to mention the very important fresh breath! Imagine speaking to someone and you are forced to take in some sort of morning breath and its not morning. Yuk yuk yuk yuk arghh!!!

The worst that could happen is bumping into an x though am sure this won't happen. Or even worse I could trip and fall...I have new heels you see.

Lets wait for tomorrow though I may need some flirting tips. I will have to come out of my shy shell be bold and try look beautiful!

Thursday, May 05, 2005

I love a conversation

I am at my mate's house the other day and we are having a laugh. Jokes are being thrown left, right and centre and the neighbours are complaining. We are louder than the music blaring from the tenje. Its seems like everything thats spoken is a joke. I am having a fab time!

There is this guy sitting there staring at his can of whatever obviously he doesn't get the jokes.

Wrong! He can't speak English. I decide to make some conversation and thats how I discover. He can only speak spanish, the sister is across the room and swings over to translate....this is interesting.

Its time to go clubbing but for me it's time to go home. I am saying my goodbyes amidst protest that I should go clubbing too. As I say bye bye to the spanish speaking fella's brother in-law, he whispers into my ear that the bratha likes me alot...already!

I drive off wondering if I'd ever date anyone whom a conversation is out of question!

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Hug anyone.......

Today am feeling like a hug. Lucky all you guys out there with someone to give you that long cuddle! Mmmmmmmmmmmhhhhh. Ooohhhhhhh how I wish!!

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

Love sucks, right?

Ok I dont know if its just me ama love sucks. I would love to meet someone who will mean the world to me and actually mean the world to me 20+ years later. I will tell you my woes as I pursue this and you can tell me where I go wrong. I hope as I put my thoughts on 'paper' answers will start rolling in.